I have been where you are standing.

My story, briefly

I did not come to this work through a textbook. I came to it because I lived it.

I was in a relationship with someone whose love was transactional. It was warm when I was useful and cold when I was not, and I spent years trying to earn back a version of them that only ever appeared when I stopped asking for anything. When it ended, it did not end cleanly. It ended with a discard, and then it continued, through systems that are supposed to protect people.

What followed was the part almost nobody prepares you for: post-separation abuse. Control that does not stop when the relationship does. It simply changes instruments. Allegations. Paperwork. Process used as a weapon. Being cast as the problem in rooms where I was trying to explain that I was not. And running underneath all of it, the loss of a relationship with my child, which is the part I will not put into detail here, because it is not only my story to tell.

I want to be careful here. I am not going to name anyone, describe my family, or turn the people involved into characters in a marketing page. Some of them are children. They did not choose to have their lives written about, and protecting them matters more to me than making this page more dramatic.

What I will tell you is what it did to me. I developed complex PTSD. I lived in a nervous system that treated a phone notification like a threat. At one point I sat on the floor of an airport, unable to move, in the kind of full-body shutdown I would later learn to call a dorsal vagal freeze. I had no language for any of it. That was the worst part. Not the pain, the confusion.

What changed

What changed was learning the mechanics. Once I understood the patterns, coercive control, trauma bonding, DARVO, reactive abuse, the cycle, I stopped asking the question that keeps people stuck for years: what is wrong with me? That question has no bottom. Replacing it with what was done, and how did it work?is where recovery actually starts.

Then I had to get my body out of survival mode, because insight alone does not do it. I trained in somatic healing and nervous system regulation, because understanding what happened and still flinching at your own phone are two entirely different problems, and only one of them is solved by reading.

The climb back was slow and it was not linear. But the sequence I went through turned out to be the sequence that works. That sequence became the RENEW Method, and it is what I now walk clients through.

How I work

Direct, private, and paced to you. I am not interested in keeping you in a program longer than you need. I will not diagnose the person who hurt you from a distance, promise to fix you in a fixed number of sessions, or tell you that every difficult person is a narcissist, because that framing is lazy and it makes people worse at reading real danger.

I will believe you. I will help you name what happened. And I will give you practical, body-based tools and standards that hold up after our work ends.

One thing I say to everyone: coaching is not therapy. I am not a licensed clinician, I do not diagnose or treat mental illness, and if what you need is clinical care, I will say so directly rather than take your money.